Miscellaneous NASA comedies

If NASA faked the moon landings, does the agency have any credibility at all? Was the Space Shuttle program also a hoax? Is the International Space Station another one? Do not dismiss these hypotheses offhand. Check out our wider NASA research and make up your own mind about it all.
ProperGander
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Re: Miscellaneous NASA comedies

Unread post by ProperGander »

Doctor Who meets NASA

http://oai.dtic.mil/oai/oai?verb=getRec ... =AD0440473

Download the .pdf file and turn to page 8 for what I hope will be something that will make you smile.

This design is featured in the book Suiting Up for Space: The Evolution of the Space Suit by Lloyd Mallan.
simonshack
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Re: Miscellaneous NASA comedies

Unread post by simonshack »

ProperGander wrote:This design is featured in the book Suiting Up for Space: The Evolution of the Space Suit by Lloyd Mallan.

Lloyd Mallan? You mean THE Lloyd Mallan? The author of this "damning conspiracy book" ? Hilarious. :lol: :lol: :lol:

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http://www.amazon.com/Russias-space-hoa ... oyd+Mallan


Page 8 of the pdf (an official '"unclassified Defense Documentation Center research document") that you linked to:

Image



Two of my favorite space suits :

Image

Image
ProperGander
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Re: Miscellaneous NASA comedies

Unread post by ProperGander »

These designs belong in art museums. I think they are inspired by 1950's "Flash Gordon' era pop art. I wish they went with those designs instead of the boring ones we ended up seeing on screen.
Perhaps there is test footage of some of these alternative designs that will surface on Youtube one day.

The last suit design is great. With the right lighting, that would have been scary on Doctor Who back in the early 1960's.
pov603
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Re: Miscellaneous NASA comedies

Unread post by pov603 »

How did they ever wipe their backsides?...it looks like the one above is trying just that!
ProperGander
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Re: Miscellaneous NASA comedies

Unread post by ProperGander »

Hilarious. :D
I like the fashion magazine-esque "HERE'S WHAT WE'LL WEAR" headline.
anonjedi2
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Re: Miscellaneous NASA comedies

Unread post by anonjedi2 »

Dear Cluesforum members,

I have not been posting much lately (busy with life and less time for research), but I do visit the site daily and make sure I am caught up on all of my reading. Today I would like to draw your attention to the latest in NASA absurdities.

According to this RT article:
A mysterious chunk of space debris will hit Earth off the coast of Sri Lanka on November 13. Scientists have no clear idea what it is, other than that it is likely artificial in origin, and have dubbed the object WT1190F.
That's right! These clever jokers are actually naming this piece of space debris (artificial in origin?) WT1190F, as in WTF-911! :rolleyes:

But wait, it gets better! Apparently these astrophysicists are claiming that this piece of space debris is likely man-made and probably comes from some artifact from the Apollo Missions! Apparently that piece of space junk has been whizzing around the planet, in orbit for the last 50 years!
Astrophysicists believe that the object could even be a memento of the Apollo missions that took US astronauts to the moon. But scientists may never discover for sure: WT1190F’s re-entry into the atmosphere would likely burn up most of the debris, before dumping it in an extremely remote spot.
How convenient <_< So ... this man-made, artificial piece of space junk is going to mostly burn up in the atmosphere but still hit the Earth near Sri Lanka? Can we get some live footage of that when it happens? It makes me wonder how Buzz and the boys and indeed all of the masons managed to re-enter the atmosphere without burning up. Oh, I'm sure NASA has all sorts of explanations about trajectory and velocity for that. :blink:
Although this is the first instance of a piece of space debris being tracked as it returns to Earth, WT1190F is not a one-off. Among all recognized space junk, there are 86 unknown objects crossing the lunar orbit, mostly lunar probes, or parts of rockets.

There are also dozens of others floating uncontrollably in outer space, of which McDowell says about 20 are being observed from Earth. These will likely outlast most objects on Earth, and would possibly be the first harbinger of our civilization to be witnessed by any other species in our universe.
:puke: At this point, these clowns don't even bother speculating about some alleged, sci-fi "other species in our universe" ... they just come right out and say it as if these alien species are an established fact.
Detected by the Catalina Sky Survey, an observation lab at the University of Tucson, the alleged piece of space debris initially puzzled observers. But astronomers then went back through the lab’s past images from telescopes, and noticed that it had been present at least since 2012
Oh? But I thought they are tracking all of these pieces of space debris? How is it that they just noticed it, 3 weeks before its impact, if it's been hurling around space for so many years, and since they claim they detected it in 2012? Did they just forget about it or it went off their radar somehow? Quite concerning that NASA would be unaware of hurling space debris, god forbid it collides with the ISS or one of their X? thousand satellites!

Enjoy more by reading the rest of the article and watching the news report here:

https://www.rt.com/news/319788-moon-space-debris-wtf/
hoi.polloi
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Re: Miscellaneous NASA comedies

Unread post by hoi.polloi »

Funny one anonjedi2. Sri Lanka — wasn't that the place arch-Psy-Fi-patron "Arthur C. Clarke" was a "one man cheering squad" for? You can read some interesting things about the guy who is credited with writing "the artificial satellite" myth and who helped turn it into a myth everyone believes. A number of these involve his base in Sri Lanka.
anonjedi2
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Re: Miscellaneous NASA comedies

Unread post by anonjedi2 »

Yes indeed, hoi! In fact, Clarke died in his home in Sri Lanka in 2008.

In order to celebrate his life,
NASA is planning to send DNA of famed British science fiction writer Sir Arthur C Clarke into space - five years after his death....aboard the Sunjammer, a solar-powered spacecraft which gets its name from the writings of Clarke.
That was supposed to happen in 2014, I wonder what ever happened to that story? :rolleyes:

http://www.ibnlive.com/news/india/nasa- ... 17860.html
simonshack
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Re: Miscellaneous NASA comedies

Unread post by simonshack »

anonjedi2 wrote:
A mysterious chunk of space debris will hit Earth off the coast of Sri Lanka on November 13. Scientists have no clear idea what it is, other than that it is likely artificial in origin, and have dubbed the object WT1190F.
:lol: :lol: :lol: Made my day ! Thanks, anonjedi.

Image
You've gotta love this little website:
WTF NASA com : http://wtfnasa.com/#

It's the sort of website which makes me think: "Hey, perhaps there ACTUALLY IS intelligent life on Earth?"
smj
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Re: Miscellaneous NASA comedies

Unread post by smj »

The narrative is brazen so Sir Arthur lived on Serendip of course...

http://cluesforum.info/viewtopic.php?f= ... r#p2393596

...Clarke dreamed up some of nasa's most ridiculous bullΨence back in his BIS days we're told:

"The roots of a satellite-based communications network can be traced to 1945, when a Royal Air Force radar specialist and member of the British Interplanetary Society, Arthur C. Clarke expounded on his concept of what is known today as the “geosynchronous satellite.” The reason geo­ synchronous communication satellites are needed is really very simple: The curvature of our Earth limits how far we can see. Consequently, a network of tracking stations, even when spread around the world, can only see and com­ municate with an orbiting satellite about 15 percent of the time, only when it passed within the station’s field-of-view. In his article, Clarke accurately hypothesized that a satellite placed into orbit at an altitude of 35,900 kilome­ ters (22,300 miles) over the Equator would circle Earth at the same angular rate that Earth rotated. In such an orbit, it would appear to an observer on the ground to be hanging motionless over the Equator. Thus, he concluded that a stationary satellite at geosynchronous altitude would be in an excellent position to relay communications around the globe. To this end, he suggested that use of three manned satellites in orbit could be used to relay programs for the newly invented medium of television.1"
http://history.nasa.gov/STDN_082508_508 ... rt%203.pdf
http://www.icarusinterstellar.org/briti ... y-society/

...the BIS is a club for spaced-out hustlers like Eric Burgess:

"In October 1945, Arthur C Clarke published his seminal paper describing the enormous potential of using manned orbiting space stations to act as 'extra-terrestrial relays' for radio and TV broadcasting [9]. Eric Burgess followed this with an article published in the November 1946 edition of Aeronautics proposing to use automatic robotic satellites in geostationary orbits for telecommunications and for meteorological and other purposes [10]. Notwithstanding Arthur Clarke's insight into global telecommunications, it is the technology first suggested in Burgess's articles, 'Into Space' and later, in 'The establishment and use of artificial satellites' [11] that best describes modern communications satellites [12]. Burgess's important contribution to the ideological notion of space-born telecommunications was acknowledged in 1980 at the opening of the Smithsonian Air and Space Museum in Washington by an exhibit showing his solar-heated, turbine-powered, satellite. As Burgess later freely acknowledged, when satellites did go into orbit a decade later their solar power generation used much simpler technology than he envisaged. A plaque honouring Burgess' efforts toward space exploration is displayed in the Smithsonian Institution.

Although now taken for granted and probably forgotten, NASA credits Eric Burgess, along with Charles A Cross, for the introduction of the term, 'interplanetary probe', first described in a joint paper, 'The Martian Probe', read to the North-Western Branch of the British Interplanetary Society in September 1952 [13], [14]. The paper explained how to calculate the trajectory of a missile traveling 34 million miles to Mars. According to Burgess, in an interview shortly before his death, many considered the idea nutty, but his vindication came when the first American probe, Mariner IV, flew by Mars in 1965. Ironically, in an e-mail communication, in February 2000, Eric told me that when writing the 'Martian Probe' he had based the paper around the idea of using the Jodrell Bank telescope, then at the design stage, as the receiver of radio signals from Mars. The Lovell Telescope was indeed used, in February 2000, in an unsuccessful attempt to detect signals from NASAs lost Martian Polar Lander."
http://www.mikeoates.org/astro-history/burgess.htm

...Eric and Arthur were RAF of course; and Eric and Charles really liked probes we're told:

"Larry Klaes has passed along another historical marker, the fact that today could be called the 60th anniversary of the interplanetary probe. As in so many eventful astronautical moments, the British Interplanetary Society was involved. Eric Burgess and C. A. Cross had come to a BIS meeting in 1952 to read a paper called “The Martian Probe,” which took the concept of an Earth satellite and extended it into a package of instruments that could be sent to Mars. Interestingly, this was at a time when Wernher von Braun was championing the huge manned expeditions that would be written up in Collier’s, along with Chesley Bonestell’s stunning artwork.

The Collier’s series began in March of 1952, and it’s likely that an unmanned probe wouldn’t have caught the eye nearly as well as the Olympian designs of von Braun as rendered by Bonestell’s talented brush. But small, realistic probes were in play in Burgess’ and Cross’ work that would lead to the later successes of Mariner, Venera and Voyager. A message from Paolo Ulivi on the FPSPACE mailing list speculates that it was this paper that began the use of ‘probe’ to refer to unmanned robotic craft. He wonders if this is true and perhaps readers here will know the answer."
http://www.centauri-dreams.org/?p=24715

...we're also told Sir Arthur recruited another science fiction author, Robert Conquest, to his silly space-brainstorming party. Besides being an interplanetary lunatic; Robert was a poet that wrote agitprop for the foreign office, a fellow at Stanford's Hoover Institute (where else would the west's leading chronicler of Soviet crimes get his hustle on?) with Condi Rice of course, and the heroic historian that introduced the holomodor to the west we're told:

"Robert Conquest, one of the greatest and most important historians of the 20th Century, died earlier this week at the age of ninety-nine. His most lasting legacy, of course, was his exposing the fraud of communism to the intelligentsia and the public, although sadly many still remain in denial of his findings regarding Stalin’s body count. I am reasonably certain most readers of this journal are not among those that need to have Conquest’s evidence presented to them; I am in fact quite certain as well that most of them know his name, and even if they have not had the chance to read his monumental works The Great Terror and Harvest of Sorrow, have read other credible sources across the political spectrum that have cited them as impeccable sources on the topic.

But how many of you are also aware that he was a science fiction fan?

As mentioned near the end of his obituary in the Daily Telegraph, Conquest was an early member of the British Interplanetary Society, persuaded to join by his friend Arthur C. Clarke. Another close friend was Kingsley Amis, with whom Conquest edited the five-book Spectrum anthology series for Gollancz Publishing; in addition to collecting some of the best science fiction up to then for British readers, Conquest provided some essays published in the anthologies and elsewhere in which he provided some of the earliest-and strongest-arguments for the already-existing literary merit of the genre. And like Amis, he ventured into SF writing himself, publishing at least one genuine science fiction novel, A World of Difference, in which he “Tuckerized” Clarke as “Sir Arthur, President of the Interplanetary Society.” Perhaps his most lasting legacy to the field was this charming ditty, included in the second volume of Spectrum:

“Sf’s no good,”
They bellow till we’re deaf.
“But this looks good.”
“Well then, it’s not sf.”"
http://nukemars.com/?p=3032
http://www.holodomor.ca/documents/Thirt ... t_anhl.pdf

...and being the versatile narrative device that he was, Mr. Conquest went all one world on us...

"In 1950 he served briefly as First Secretary in the British Delegation to the United Nations"
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Robert_Conquest

...Conquest was amply rewarded of course...

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http://www.kyivpost.com/content/ukraine ... 95221.html
http://www.nytimes.com/2015/08/05/arts/ ... .html?_r=0
http://news.stanford.edu/news/2005/nove ... 13005.html

...I'm sure old Bobby Conquest was just trying to keep us safe. Those Bullshitviks had nukes, right?


full link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CfBLXLz4wQ8

...but whatever, I'm not a holomodor denier...

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Denial_of_the_Holodomor

...so fuck the jews of course; and any other clan that drives the narrative...

I'm just glad there are heroic intelligence officers like Bobby Conquest, and emotional negresses like Aretha, and avaricious shylocks like Greenspan to keep the gullible apes fat, stupid and happy...

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Take care out there the hustle is deep; don't drown in its sea of malefactors.
ICfreely
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Re: Miscellaneous NASA comedies

Unread post by ICfreely »

smj wrote:Take care out there the hustle is deep;
It sure is, smj!

I was going to add this TMZ thought police shit piece to the “Endeavour...” thread but it may belong here.


NASA - Beyonce 'Trivialized' Deaths of Challenger Crew
1/1/2014 6:50 AM PST BY TMZ STAFF
http://www.tmz.com/2014/01/01/beyonce-n ... stronauts/
Beyonce got off easy with NASA ... rather than saying she blatantly exploited the deaths of the Challenger astronauts, the space agency essentially said she dishonored the memories of the crew.
:lol:
As you know ... Beyonce's song, "XO" begins with sound from mission control in 1986 ... as they react to the spaceship blowing up and the 7 crew members careening to the ground.
Ten, Nine, Eight, Seven, Six, Five, Four, Three, Two, One, Lift-off
NASA 's response ... "The Challenger accident is an important part of our history; a tragic reminder that space exploration is risky and should never be trivialized."

Beyonce came out with a bizarre, hollow justification ... "The song 'XO' was recorded with the sincerest intention to help heal those who have lost loved ones to remind us that unexpected things happen ..."
:(
It's not exactly that there was suddenly a burning need to help the families cope with the deaths that are almost 2 decades old.

Could it be that Beyonce just knows good drama when she sees it?

Could it be that Beyonce knows Jack Schitt?
(http://www.whoisjackshit.com/)

Could it be that this was NASA’s message to Bey & Jay?

This is Ground Control to Uncle Tom
You've really made the U-P-G-R-A-Y-E-D-D
And the papers want to know whose shirts you wear
Can you hear me Uncle Tom?


I sho' can, Miss Daisy!
smj
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Re: Miscellaneous NASA comedies

Unread post by smj »

Oh is it ever deep, IC...

Everybody knows Jack told nasa to go to the moon but how many remember that he was a big-time one worlder? I had forgotten; but fortunately a former senator and Kennedy aide, Harris Wofford reminded me:

"On June 10, 1963, President Kennedy delivered the commencement address at American University in Washington, DC. That speech is often remembered for a pair of nuclear announcements – the suspension of American atmospheric tests and the opening of negotiations on a comprehensive test ban treaty. It is usually forgotten that JFK also presented in this speech the idea of a pathway toward “not merely peace in our time but peace in all time.”

In the speech, President Kennedy asked Americans to reexamine their pessimism about the human prospect. “Too many of us think … that war is inevitable, that mankind is doomed, that we are gripped by forces we cannot control.” But he insisted that “human destiny” remained in human hands. A durable peace, said JFK, could be constructed “not on a sudden revolution in human nature but on a gradual evolution in human institutions … World peace, like community peace, does not require that each man love his neighbor. It requires only that they live together in mutual tolerance, submitting their disputes to a just and peaceful settlement.”

Then President Kennedy became more specific: “We seek to strengthen the United Nations … to develop it into a genuine world security system … This will require a new effort to achieve world law. … Our primary long range interest … is general and complete disarmament … to build the new institutions of peace which would take the place of arms.”

Fourteen years earlier, JFK had endorsed a legislative action that described the kind of “new institutions of peace” that would constitute “a genuine world security system.” In June 1949, Representative John F. Kennedy – along with more than 100 other sitting members of the House and the Senate – proposed the transformation of the United Nations into a world federation.

House Concurrent Resolution 64 read as follows: “. . . t is the sense of the Congress that it should be a fundamental objective of the foreign policy of the United States to support and strengthen the United Nations and to seek its development into a world federation, open to all nations, with defined and limited powers adequate to preserve peace and prevent aggression through the enactment, interpretation, and enforcement of world law.”"
https://fas.org/pir-pubs/jfk-one-world- ... world-law/

...Senator Wofford was writing for the Federation of American Scientists, the fine bullΨence hustlers that gave us the "one world or none" video I posted above. The Federation assembled a fine group of hustlers...

http://fas.org/oneworld/

...I reckon we already have a one world Ψentific humanist dictatorship. We're told the Rockefeller's (the financeers of the molecular biology hustle) secured the land to build the 65 million dollar UN headquarters in Manhattan, Kennedy gets martyred on the fuckin' Ψ symbol in Dallas, then the wavefunction theory collapses (wtc) at ground zero, and now finally we can 'see forever' from the one world observatory...


full link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jHdrnjx8O3s

No wonder that heroic dipshit Neil Armstrong answered thusly when he was asked what he thinking when he was saluting the flag on the fuckin' moon:

“I suppose you’re thinking about pride and patriotism,” he replied. “But we didn’t have a strong nationalistic feeling at that time. We felt more that it was a venture of all mankind.”

But whatever, maybe I just have a shitty g factor. Anyone know a good Ψchometrician?

...and unironically enough, even though Sir Francis gave us the art of Ψchometry; the first Ψchometrical laboratory was at the Cavendish lab, Cambridge we're told...

http://www.psychometrics.cam.ac.uk/abou ... laboratory
http://www.galton.org/books/psychometri ... metric.pdf

The Ψchometricians gave us little g of course; and Henry Cavendish helped us accurately determine Newton's big G. Henry's balls and his übermenschlich g factor were extraordinary of course:

"What was extraordinary about Cavendish’s experiment was its elimination of every source of error and every factor that could disturb the experiment and its precision in measuring an astonishingly small attraction, a mere 1/50,000,000 of the weight of the lead balls. The result that Cavendish obtained for the density of the Earth is within 1 percent of the currently accepted figure."
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Henry_Cavendish

Maxwell named the Cambridge Laboratory in deference to Henry's cousin, William. William gave the Ψentific hustlers in Cambridge a shit ton of loot we're told. William was a duke of course, seeing as most of the Cavendish clan are...

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/House_of_Cavendish



Funny story- Jack's big sis, Kick, married into the Cavendish clan. But seeing as Kick was a Kennedy the narrative killed her off a few years later in a tragic plane crash, but not before her Marquess and big brother Joe were both tragically killed off by the narrative less than one month apart of course:

"Kathleen and Hartington spent less than five weeks together before he went out to fight in France. Four months after their marriage, and less than a month after Joe Jr. was killed, Hartington was killed by a sniper during a battle near the German Front. With his family's blessing, he was buried close to where he fell. His younger brother Lord Andrew Cavendish, who was married to Deborah Mitford of the famous Mitford sisters, thus became the heir apparent to the dukedom as Hartington had left no heirs.

Popular on the London social circuit and admired by many for her high spirits and wit, Lady Hartington eventually became romantically involved with the Earl Fitzwilliam.[5] Fitzwilliam was in the process of divorcing his wife. Once again, Rose Kennedy expressed her disapproval of her daughter's suitor and warned her that she would be disowned by the family and cut off financially if she married Fitzwilliam. In May 1948, Kathleen learned that her father would be traveling to Paris. In an effort to gain his consent for her upcoming plans to marry Fitzwilliam, she decided to fly to Paris to meet with her father."
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kathlee ... Hartington

...the narrative had her flight to see her dear old former movie mogul father take off at 3:30 so it crashed of course: but don't worry the Kennedy acting troupe ain't a sentimental bunch we're told:

"Her father was the only family member to attend the funeral, arranged by the Cavendishes. Rose Kennedy refused to attend her daughter's memorial service, choosing to enter a hospital for routine medical tests."


Another funny story- the Ψentific hustler that wrote and directed this piece of shite, Ashley Montagu...


full link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CfBLXLz4wQ8

...studied under Karl Pearson and Charles Spearman of course; little g is called Spearman's g sometimes seeing as he invented the abstraction that people who think they are clever have grown to misunderstand and love.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ashley_Montagu

One fuckin' world indeed.
smj
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Re: Miscellaneous NASA comedies

Unread post by smj »

"NASA is planning to send DNA of famed British science fiction writer Sir Arthur C Clarke into space - five years after his death....aboard the Sunjammer, a solar-powered spacecraft which gets its name from the writings of Clarke."


full link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iL-n1L-O_x4

...Our deoxy-bla...bla..bla was serendipitously 'resolved' at the Cavendish as well of course; but I've gone thru the Jacob's ladder nonsense already...

http://cluesforum.info/viewtopic.php?f= ... 7#p2394080
ICfreely
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Re: Miscellaneous NASA comedies

Unread post by ICfreely »

smj,

In all seriousness, your research is a cut above anything I’ve ever come across. It goes without saying that most (if not all) of my posts draw heavily from your (among others) posts. You should post links to all of your work so people can appreciate how deep the hustle is. Call it the "SMJ Scrolls."

I’m planning on revisiting the Dali-DNA connection as well as the ‘DNA Wars’ (‘legalizing’ DNA testing) of the early 1990’s that humanity lost thanks to the O.J. Simpson Circus.

Too many topics and avenues of research & too little space-time!
anonjedi2
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Re: Miscellaneous NASA comedies

Unread post by anonjedi2 »

A friend of mine sent this to me yesterday and I thought the fine folks here at Cluesforum (especially you, Simon!) would appreciate this in all of its comedic glory. Behold ... NASA claims that this depiction of bright city lights in Australia from space is an actual real metropolitan area. In reality, it's in the middle of the desert!

Image
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